A man will not leave his wife. We reveal the secrets of why men don’t leave for their mistress. I'm leaving because I have no strength

"You should read this article too. It will reveal the secret of why women tend to believe cheaters. And, of course, why they believe that he will stay with them.

I love a married man. His wife is bad

As was described in the previous two articles written on this topic, only those men who are teenagers at heart have mistresses. Immature and unclaimed, they begin to tell their new objects of adoration a fairy tale that their “today’s wife” treats them poorly. They continually tell their mistress about all the cases of inattention, lack of care and complete misunderstanding.

You should not believe in a fairy tale that he specially invented for you! Why save this careless teenager from the evil and inattentive woman running his house?

A woman who tries on the mask of a mistress must realize that she is subconsciously putting herself on the altar of their short-term and unequal relationship. A man simply needs to stroke his pride and prove to his beloved that he is still capable of “feats.” So why do you women want to be good for this man? Why do YOU ​​cross out your own problems from life and plunge headlong into his?

And, of course, one of the most popular bedtime stories is that he does not leave his wife because he cannot leave his children.

Women, remember once and for all, man is one of those creatures who do everything in this life only for themselves, only for the sake of their loved one. And a man does not leave his former family not because of his pregnant wife, small child and the like. He doesn't leave because of himself...

When will he leave his wife?

Of course, every lover asks the question: When will he finally leave this unbearable and evil woman? When will he leave his wife? When will he pack his things and come to me?

This whole situation actually resembles the relationship between a nurse and an old man who is on the verge of death. What is the nurse waiting for? The moment when the old man finally passes into another world. Something similar is hidden in the head of a woman who is waiting for the arrival of her man from an old family. Is she waiting for that very moment to happen when it happens that he leaves his evil wife?

Experts in the field of psychology and participants in the popular television project “” are confident that due to all this, emotions in a person’s head become negative. Anger, resentment and rage arise in the heart and soul... what can grow on such soil? Is it really true that a modern woman does not realize that initially relationships must be built on trust and understanding, on love and joy.

And envy, jealousy and dislike for other people’s children enslave the brain and make it embittered, and there is nothing worse and more terrible than a woman baring her teeth at the whole world, at the whole planet.

For a real woman, such feelings will lead to humiliation and destruction. Such a woman will not be able to create a real family. She will not be able to give birth to normal children and endure normal relationships.

Then, after a while, she will start, which under no circumstances should be done. What's next? Then a new circle will begin. Her man will want to leave the family. He will make a decision find another woman and a good wife.

I don't like myself

And of course, one more thing must certainly offend a woman-lover: a man in a relationship of this kind will act as a consumer, while a woman will become a banal field for restoring his energy and for his relaxation. He will perceive her as nothing more than a bed. Her body and soul will be wasted for pennies, and in the end, she will be alone with her loneliness. In a world full of disappointment and betrayal.

Maybe the fear in her is not at all due to a lack of love and attention, it is possible that she is afraid of being left alone. Is it not this very fear that pushes her into this kind of relationship? Just don’t deceive yourself, because in the end the woman is still left alone. A man comes when he is interested, all other days are his personal space, without a trace of the existence of “another woman.”

There is an opinion that a marriage built on women's tears does not lead to anything good. Naturally, everything in the world is structured in such a way that for every misdemeanor, for every action you will have to pay. Such relationships will never lead to anything. The lover’s world, already built on tears at the first stage, will die as soon as she reaches her goal. You can convince your body and brain that everything was done correctly, but convincing your soul and telling your heart to forget about what you did is impossible. The feeling of guilt will forever remain in the heart, which the afterlife will not give you peace.

So, the psychics and clairvoyants of the television project “” are sure that the world of a mistress is a world of destruction and emotional suffering.

What should a woman and her world be like?

Today, even without the help of specialists in the field of the supernatural, every adult understands that his world is built from the actions he has committed.

As for mistresses, these are people upset and disappointed in men. They desire happiness and become blind to their immediate goal.

A woman was created to give life, to make the world a better place. This is the only way she can count on a good attitude towards herself.

Even if YOU fall in love with a married man, try to remain human. Remember that at the “other end of the line” there is also a woman waiting for him to come home. If you build your world and new relationships on kindness and understanding, you can count on the best. For a good relationship.

Pray for your competitors! And remember that a man does not leave woman for woman. Don't think that wife was bad and you will become a good wife. A man leaves his family because of the wealth that the woman no longer gives him. Everything else is a fairy tale about an evil wife, naughty children and eternal problems, just an attempt to elevate you in your own eyes.

And remember, always remember that a man who does not leave the family for more than a year while being in a relationship with you... will never leave his wife. So, don't waste your time on losers and mama's boys. Grow up yourself and the world will show you all the facets of happiness!

I am the mistress of a married man. The relationship developed gradually, like teenagers. Intimate relationships appeared only six months later. Everything is so harmonious with us. He was always on his own (before me). I never discussed my emotions with anyone. I'm such a psychologist myself. He opened up to me, we talk a lot, drink tea, and cook together. After a year of such a relationship, naturally, I began to wonder what was next. We sat down, talked, cried and decided that we needed to separate and get over it. He cannot get a divorce: 18 years of marriage, two children - a sense of duty, in general. We suffered for 2.5 months. He lost a fair amount of weight and even turned grey. It was blacker than night (we work together - we tried not to cross paths). Then they got back together again. We can't live without each other. We love you very much. We really love it - we checked it. But he says he can’t get a divorce. In general, he and I have constant doubts. Sometimes he himself says that we will be together and there will be children, and sometimes he says that he will not leave his family. Now we are discussing again what to do. But we can’t find a solution. What to do? A? Help.

Lera, Ukraine, 30 years old / 02/20/16

Our experts' opinions

• Alyona

  Lera, self-deception is a great power. No one can deceive us better than ourselves. For “ah, it’s not difficult to deceive me, I myself am glad to be deceived.” This is a classic. And what happens to you is also a classic. And your married lover also acts classically, as in the unwritten, unofficial encyclopedias of lovers and mistresses. You can, for example, watch the video of “Quartet I” to sober up - finding their “What to say to your mistress” on Youtube will not be difficult. Of course, a “sense of duty” does not allow your man to leave the family. How else. It is because of this sense of duty that he runs to the left, spends his free time on you, which, obviously, only a developed sense of duty does not allow him to spend on two children (God bless her, with his wife). It is the sense of duty that forces him to spend money on his mistress rather than invest in his family. But seriously: try to soberly assess the situation and understand that they marry the women they love no matter what. And no 18 years of marriage and a couple of children would have become an obstacle if you really were so exceptional, such an outlet, next to whom he finally became himself, opened up. But no. You're not like that. You are just a convenient girl with whom you can solve some of your problems. And why not play along with you so that you feel special and start dreaming of a better life than being near him. As for gray hair, I’ll tell you a terrible secret: everyone turns gray with age. And men too. And your lover, I suspect, is already over 40. So nothing surprising. Have you lost weight? How do you know that it is because of worries about you, and not for other reasons? Never take the word of a man who deceives the people closest to him: his wife and children. Only a real fool can think that this lie is only for “that” family, and nothing like that can happen to them. They are lying to you. Right now. And you are wasting your life like the last idiot.

• Sergey

  Lera, as an adult, you should have already come to the idea that in terms of relationships, “I can’t” is just a convenient form of “I don’t want,” nothing more. And the person who says this is just looking for a reason not to change anything in the current situation. Why? Yes, because everything suits him. After all, your blackened, gray-haired dystrophy is now all “in chocolate.” There is an official family, children, an established circle of friends, a familiar way of life. He also has a mistress with whom he can realize some additional “left” desires that cannot be satisfied in the family. That is, he has everything for a comfortable life. And the only thing that makes the uncle worry is the “itching” that has begun in this very mistress, who wants to destroy the entire idyll. Here you will inevitably lose weight. After all, he naturally does not intend to leave his family anywhere. Destroying what is existing and building something new is, you know, a pleasure below average, and the uncle is no longer a boy and understands perfectly well that emotional impulses on the theme “I renounce everything, choose love” are the lot of teenagers who have nothing to lose at all , or well-to-do aristocrats, who, if they lose anything, then, firstly, it is not critical for the general welfare, and secondly, they immediately receive dividends from public opinion. No, of course, and among ordinary people there are many determined individuals who are ready to destroy anything for the sake of their own happiness. But for this you need to be sure that there will be happiness, and really love your partner madly, and even better, if in the previous family everything has already collapsed by itself and there is still no life there. In your case, the man has neither confidence in your future together, nor, as I understand it, special love. And there is no need to talk about the fact that behind him there are only ruins. I wouldn’t even be surprised if his wife “neither dreams nor spirits” about your relationship and how bad everything is for them. In this regard, I personally would advise you to end the relationship as soon as possible and even change your job to avoid relapses. Otherwise, you will only waste both time and nerves completely in vain. Alas, even if you manage to take a man away from your family through some kind of blackmail, nothing meaningful will most likely come of it. Firstly, because meeting on neutral territory and living together permanently are two huge differences. Romance passes quickly, and what remains is everyday life, which is not so easy to establish at your age. Everyone has their own habits, views, opinions on any matter. And changing them to please someone is very difficult. Therefore, in life together, “little things” will inevitably appear, such as the distribution of responsibilities in your home, “grinding in of character” will begin, and there will be the first quarrels. You will probably start talking about children, and the man will try to lead them aside, because he already has offspring, he knows how much hassle they are and how expensive they are, and therefore he will not rush to replenish the zoo. You will begin to “stress” about this, and the discord will intensify. Yes, and relatives and friends will initially organize a “boycott”, which is why there will be no one even to “cry” to your friend. That is, there will be negligible joy and fun, but there will be a lot of problems. And your roommate may suddenly really want to go back to their familiar surroundings. He will start visiting the children, then he will start staying there at night. Then the environment will “put pressure”, they say, stop fooling around, return to your family. And as a result, you will cry again in the kitchen, after which the man will happily jump under his wife’s wing, and you will be left to collect the broken dishes. For what? No, of course, everyone is free to ruin their life in their own way. However, try to think with your head before getting involved with a man who not only has a “long tail” in the form of children whom he will have to support, visit, and take to the sea, but is also very unscrupulous in terms of family relationships. After all, he is now deceiving his wife, running to you. Why do you think he won't repeat this to you?

Firstly, because you are asking this question. This means that the man did not give you confidence - his supposedly most beloved woman in the world. No, he made a lot of words and promises and even gave ironclad explanations as to why he was still there, but you still doubt it.

Secondly, men and women initially have different goals. It happens that a married man actually falls in love, but the last thing he wants is to ruin his usual life. If he falls in love (and not just has an affair) with another woman, he himself is not happy, because it causes a lot of trouble and discomfort. And all he dreams of in such a situation is that the affair with you goes without inconvenience. That is, he initially does not want to leave. Imagine yourself in this situation - you are married, have children, and then someone else blows your mind. You wouldn't want that in your life. And if this really happened and they fell in love, then they would try to get off with little bloodshed - that is, sleep several times, enjoy the new relationship and hope that they will let you go. It's the same for men. Whether his family is good or bad, suits him or not, likes or dislikes - this is all secondary. Everything is clearly outlined in his head (although he can say with a sad look that he is completely confused) - the wife has her own role, the mistress has her own. And his dream is for everything to remain unchanged. Hence the reasons for the suffering of all mistresses - they do not understand How can you avoid leaving your unloved wife for the woman you love?. How can you call at 2 am and die of love, run to look for strawberries in the middle of winter and go back to the hated house.

Thirdly, you yourself missed the moment. The phrase “don’t mess with a married man” can be taken not only in a moral context, but also literally, placing emphasis on the words “don’t mess with.” That is, don’t get involved, don’t give in, and don’t give up. No, you can even sleep, but all your behavior should indicate that you are free from your feelings for him and do not demand anything. And in general, you need a serious relationship, so with him it’s like that, for a couple of times. He's married. And then, at the very peak of feelings, there is a chance that he will “forge while it’s hot” and pack his things to move in with you. But usually this doesn’t happen, because you have different goals - to take you away from your wife, and to leave everything as it is for him. Therefore, the man preemptively lies on his ears about love and how he will get a divorce, so that the girl will melt and give herself to him. Well, then you don’t have to stress anymore. Bird in a cage. The bird faithfully awaits his calls and visits and plaintively asks (or furiously demands) to stay with her forever. Why does he need it? She’s already given up and isn’t going anywhere.

Fourthly, you need to remember - men are not women. Even if he doesn’t love his wife, got married on the fly, was disappointed in her... - tell me what else they usually say - this does not mean that love is generally a priority for him. Yes, he doesn’t love his wife, but he loves you. But this is not a reason for divorce for him. These are women running, dropping their slippers, to their beloved. Men don't do this every time. Family is family, love is love. Flies from cutlets separately. If this were not so, he would not have lived with his unloved wife. Neither for the sake of the children, nor for himself.

Fifthly, a man does not start a relationship with his mistress in order to change her for a wife. The role of a mistress is to remain a connection on the side, and not to take a place nearby. But what about those who leave their wives and marry a second time, you ask? They don't go to their mistresses. They leave their wife. Do you feel the difference? If a girl initially found herself in the status of a mistress, then she should stay there. Unless something happens in his family that forces him to leave. But it will be THERE, a decision made as a result of his relationship with his wife, and not because of love for his mistress. And those who leave leave immediately. There is not a single circumstance that could prevent a man from leaving his family if he decides to do so. If such circumstances do exist, these are fairy tales for lovers. If it is difficult for a man to leave the friend zone, then it is almost impossible for a woman to leave the role of a mistress.

Sixth, take the information literally, without subtext or hidden meaning. If a man says that you understand him in a way that his wife has never tried (“Margot, you are the only woman who understands me” (c)), then this means exactly what he said - that you have a rare mutual understanding. And period. This does not mean that he feels bad with his wife, that he does not love her and wants to be with you. This means one wave. That's all. The same thing with the phrase “I have never felt so good with anyone,” “I have never been so happy.” Yes, you really are just great. But it doesn't mean anything other than that.

And what about love? The love that he talks about with a sigh and proves with all his actions (except for divorce cough-cough), the love that makes him write crazy SMS and be jealous of every post? I have already written several times before - love can be very different, and everyone has their own attitude towards this feeling. Not to mention the fact that a person can think that he loves, but in fact be mistaken, mistaking passion, infatuation, or strong infatuation for love.

And now I want to invite you to play detective and, based on the available facts, determine How will the relationship between a man and his mistress end?. The story was taken from an anonymous forum. So, a man and a woman met, both married, both with children. And they became lovers. The man talks about unearthly love, that he does not love his wife and has never loved him, and lives for the sake of the child. But he will still leave his wife and even sets specific deadlines - when the country house he is building especially for his daughter will be completed and will be registered on
her name. He spends a lot of time with his mistress, stays overnight, answers the phone at any time, and can call himself at night. He talks to his wife in front of his mistress and sharply replies that everything is over between them and that she should leave him alone. He doesn’t sleep with his wife; as evidence, he shows his mistress an SMS from her: “Are you really that comfortable without sex? Maybe we can resume our relationship or at least sleep together?” As a result, the mistress divorced her husband, went to an apartment rented by her lover, and is waiting for him to sort out his affairs and the divorce. In the comments, absolutely everyone is convinced that the man will not get a divorce. Moreover, the wife doesn’t even know about her mistress. Explain why?

1. If a man decides to leave, he leaves. No circumstances will stop him. Especially something as stupid as building a house. What prevents him from building this house while living with his mistress? Absolutely nothing. How does living under the same roof with your wife speed up its construction?
2. A man sees that his beloved woman has left her husband, i.e. I left my family and child for him. But he, in turn, did not do this.
3. The fact that he spends a lot of time with his mistress and even spends the night with her and celebrates holidays is not an indicator. This is an indicator of a crisis in relations with his wife. But not that he will divorce this wife.
4. Read carefully the SMS from your wife - “are you really comfortable without sex?” This clearly shows that the wife is not aware of the presence of a mistress. Otherwise, she would have known that her husband was having sex. And everything is quite comfortable for him.
5. Judging by the story, everything is really very bad in the man’s family. And yet he is in no hurry to get a divorce. Therefore, family for him is something different than love with his wife. This means his love for his mistress will not be a reason for leaving.
6. In the comments, the mistress wrote that she was already in the hospital with a nervous breakdown. That is, it turns out that for a man, life with an unloved wife, their bad relationship and lack of sex are still a priority than the peace of mind of his mistress.

And there are tons of such stories. You say - but many leaving their wives for mistresses. Of course they leave. They pack their things and leave. And all issues are already being resolved from the new place of residence. Or they pull and pull, but only leave when their wives have already kicked out. Well, or the third option - men for whom everything is easy - they easily created a family, left it and went to their mistress. And then just as easily he moved on. The second wives of such men very often write, “We lived in perfect harmony for 9 years, and now he’s gone.” Because for the majority of at least somewhat responsible men, the loss of a family (no matter what the relationship with his wife is) is a drama, a nuisance or just “hemorrhoids” (depending on the level of the man himself) and they do everything to avoid it. And not even because he is such an exemplary family man - it’s a question of his personal comfort. And this comfort is that everything remains unchanged.

“Why doesn’t he leave his wife?” is a question often asked to psychologists by mistresses exhausted by waiting. Really, why? After all, he says that he loves her, cannot live without her, and has an ardent passion for her. But he continues to feed his beloved with promises and... remains in the family. And this goes on for years.
It's actually simple. In order for everything to remain the same, the man has good reasons. Which?..

List of excuses

If you listen to all the reasons that men express (or, in today’s language, “rub in”) to their mistresses, there are several of them. All of them are standard and have been known for a long time. Apparently, men don’t have enough imagination for more.

1. The wife has become different, not the same as before. I stopped taking care of myself and became unattractive. There has been nothing connecting him and his wife for a long time; they are strangers and simply coexist. Of course, they haven't slept together for a long time.
In fact, this is a lie. In 90% of cases, the wife is a normal attractive woman with whom he sleeps peacefully. Yes, this does not happen as often as before, because he is somewhat bored with family sex. But still, he fulfills his marital duties as expected. It is known that a man needs novelty. A lover becomes a cure for boredom: she excites him, warms his blood, with her he feels in demand, courageous, desired, feels that he is still wow!

2. The wife does not look after the house, children, and neglects household responsibilities. She is only interested in her friends and work.
In fact, in most cases, everything is fine in the family: there is a three-course dinner in the refrigerator, the apartment is cleaned, the children are well-groomed. We all know that modern women try to keep up on all fronts. They go to work, earn money, and in the evenings they work hard at home, prepare food, look after the children.

3. “My wife is sick, I’m afraid to upset her. She won’t stand my leaving, it will finish her off.”
Oh, these songs about a sick wife... In fact, the wife is alive and well. If you want to make sure of this, watch her at her house or look for her page on social networks, where she is depicted in photographs.

4. “I only live with her because of the children.”
This may be true. Although having children will not stop most men from getting a divorce if they actually decide to leave the family. You can be a good father even after a divorce.

5. “I’ll get a divorce when the child graduates from school, college, gets a job, gets married, gets married...” (fill in as necessary).
The wait for a child to achieve this or that can last for years or even decades. The child has grown up a long time ago, but things are still there, new reasons are being invented.

6. Your lover must be sent on an important business trip (promoted, etc.), and a divorce will prevent this.
Etc.

“Not a single man who has a mistress told her that his wife is very good, satisfies him in bed, and is at the same time a good mother and housewife,” says psychologist Victoria Fadeeva. - No one. The psyche of men is designed in such a way that they do not like change, and change their lives only in one case: if they are completely dissatisfied with life with a woman. If a man doesn’t want to change anything, it means only one thing: he’s happy with everything. There is no other option. If your loved one does not consider it necessary to change anything, it means that they have much more in common with their wife than with you. Each of you plays your roles in this performance. The most profitable role went to your man. You satisfy many of his needs, he has romantic sex, a fairy tale, novelty of sensations, satisfied pride and the ability to control the situation, since at any moment he can get up and leave, citing the fact that his “unloved” wife is waiting for him. But at home he receives satisfaction of a different order, and this other is no less important to him than yours. And, perhaps, more, since he worries about his wife’s psychological comfort, but not about yours. Your beautiful story about how he doesn’t love his wife is your vision of the situation. This is your perspective. You don’t see their relationship, you don’t watch them from the outside, you don’t live that family life...”

He is cozy and comfortable, he has everything

Why would he, in fact, ruin his life and go somewhere? He has everything: a well-established life, a house, children. When he comes home from work, his family greets him and rejoices. On weekends and holidays, the whole family goes to their parents or goes with the children to a museum or skating rink. Everything is fine with them.

Yes, the man is somewhat bored with family sex, it has become prosaic, it lacks sharpness and novelty. But that's what a mistress is for. She is always waiting, always happy, always ready. She carefully prepares for each date: she puts on makeup, combs her hair, and dresses smartly. Her eyes sparkle, she serves a beautiful dinner, then violent sex with passions takes place. Everything is wonderful!
Why would he change anything? Why should he destroy his established life and set off on a “new voyage” with many unknowns?..
He has no serious reasons to get a divorce. Everything suits him. And if so, why leave the family?

Family is not only love, sex, romance

Family is something more. This is a common life, friendship, trust, support. This is a history of relationships, common memories, a single circle of friends, multiple family and friendly ties. Finally, this is a long-term habit.
Having a family, a man has a strong social position. To abandon her like this, overnight, means to find yourself in emptiness. And this is a very difficult feeling.

In addition, there are many official problems. How to divide property: apartment, car, dacha, garage and much more? Who will the children stay with? After all, they have to pay alimony, and this is a serious burden on the budget. Too many problems pile up, the man turns away from them, he doesn’t need them. It’s easier to come up with an excuse for your beloved and close the issue for some time.

Of course, coming up with reasons why he cannot leave the family, the man realizes that he is deceiving his mistress. This makes it hard for him, he worries in his soul. Then he begins to deceive himself, telling himself: “Someday later I will do this. Necessarily…". He comes up with some deadlines for himself and constantly pushes them back. It seems to him that he is not deceiving anyone, only objective circumstances for some reason get in the way.

How to get out of a vicious circle?

So, the man has no incentive to leave the family. On the one hand, he has wild sex, vivid emotions, and a woman in love with him. On the other hand, he has a home and an established family life. Why would he suddenly give it all up?
Now, if his mistress had set a condition for him: “Get a divorce, or it’s all over!” - then he would have thought about it.

But this can only be done when passions are still strong, when they seethe and boil. During this period, a man is in love, he lost his head from attraction and novelty. This usually happens in the first year of a relationship. And then the usual routine begins to creep up. Even if the relationship continues to exist, it becomes more mundane, ordinary, and is no longer as exciting.

Therefore, if the beloved really understood that this is the man of her life and she wants to be with him until the end, then she must set him a condition and a strict deadline: “If you want to be with me, first get a divorce. Now go away. I give you two months to make a decision and do everything. Otherwise it’s over and don’t come back.”
And close the door behind him. Do not answer calls, SMS, delete him from your contacts.
Under no circumstances should you let him near you - under any circumstances! Unless a woman can stand the separation and breaks down and lets him in again - all is lost. The man will understand that she will always forgive and accept him.
Such a relationship can drag on for years and ruin a woman’s life. She will lose several years, grow old, and become rancid. It may take a lot of time to restore peace of mind.

According to statistics, 85 percent of unfaithful husbands do not intend to leave their family, says psychologist Natalya Mikhailova. Other experts give the following figure: only 12% of unfaithful husbands divorce their wives and marry their mistresses. It turns out that only one out of seven or eight men is ready to start building a new life for the sake of their beloved.
What should those women do who are not so lucky?..

“Statistics show that if a man does not change anything in his life within a year from the start of romantic encounters, then with a 99% probability he does not want to build a relationship with this mistress,” continues Victoria Fadeeva. - A love story lasting more than a year is unlikely to have a serious continuation. What to do? Change your behavioral script. Stop being "nice". Claim your rights, set boundaries, set conditions. If your man truly values ​​you, he will accept responsibility for making decisions and stop living in two houses. Having set the conditions, be consistent, do not compromise, think about yourself and your future.”

So, there are not enough men for everyone.

Some are lucky to grab a piece of simple female happiness, some are in a state of active search, while others do not hesitate to set their eyes on other people’s goods. This is where the card fell. Or love came unexpectedly. Or the devil got me wrong.

Be that as it may, there are a lot of young ladies having affairs with men burdened with a wife, children, mother-in-law, dacha and a small dog. And their hearts are full of hope. But the loving womanizers are in no hurry to pack their bags and fly away from their carefully built family nest. Alas and ah.

It must be said that all the stories of love triangles are similar to each other, like the scripts of Brazilian TV series. Over the last hundred years, men's fantasies have not become one iota more diverse. The same most curious story wanders from mouth to mouth.

We heard, of course. My wife and I have been strangers for a long time. Nothing connects. They haven't slept together for many years. They live only for the sake of their children. When the children grow up a little more, he will make up his mind. Only one thing is amazing. The fact that every young lady who gets caught in the net sincerely believes that in her case everything is so. It is her story that is special. The real truth.

For others, this is melancholy and banality. And we have a fairy tale and a happy ending. And the day is not far off when the betrothed will pack his suitcase and leave the long-disgusted family nest forever.

However, the years go by, the children grow up, and for some reason the loved one is still in no hurry to leave his wife and begin filing the divorce procedure. Or at least pack your things and move in with your mistress, who is languishing in anticipation of the prince, finding more and more reasons to postpone the X-day.

What are the most common excuses used by unfaithful husbands? Leading the list of reasons that supposedly prevent Hymen from cutting the ill-fated bonds are, of course, children. Of course, it is only for the sake of children that a man continues to support this whole farce called “family life.” Otherwise... My wife is like that. I'll bake it on the side. Yes, we remember. The children will grow up, start their own families, and then... I’m not a kid, I’m thirty years old. And it will be fifty.

The second most common excuses are financial reasons. There are options here. For example, all factories, houses and ships are registered in the name of the spouse, and in the event of a divorce, the spouse will be forced to be left without pants. Well, you understand, dear: we won’t sue this vixen for a penny. We have to wait. I'll decide everything.

The third most popular reason for reluctance to leave the family is the serious illness of the legal spouse (ugh, ugh, ugh). She, poor thing, is supposedly so bad that she will simply stretch her legs without him. A compassionate knight, without fear and reproach, cannot leave the poor thing to the mercy of fate. And the sad news of a breakup will finally cripple the patient. At least ask for a certificate. God bless everyone.

Here, in fact, is a brief summary of the fables that unfaithful spouses treat naive mistresses to. Fairy tales are as old as time. And they seem to last forever.

How are things really going?

Alas. No matter how much girls thirsting for family happiness console themselves with hopes of quiet family happiness, the answer is obvious. If a man does not leave his wife, it means that everything suits him. The current situation completely satisfies him, and he is not going to change anything.

Judge for yourself. Why would he change anything?

He's comfortable. He has a family (quite likely a loved one), a life as comfortable as slippers, established habits and trips to the country on weekends. Everything is fine. Everything is smooth and comfortable.

Why should he throw away everything that he has acquired through back-breaking labor, where so many emotions have been invested, to which he has devoted his whole life, and start all over from scratch? And who knows what is beyond the horizon? Will they take you back? But you never know... In general, it’s as if something wouldn’t work out.

Yes, the soul sometimes requires novelty. Yes, life has become a little boring. Yes, my wife is a little tired. Why not wipe away a light touch of dust and mold from your established life by diluting your usual routine with a romance with a lovely young (even if not very) nymph? Don't go into all troubles, so to speak. To hang noodles on the young lady's ears. Have fun, and then return to your usual slippers.

And this can last for years.

And he's not going to change anything. And period. And there is no point in making theories.

No matter what those who want to console the suffering lovers of other people's goods say, those who leave, leave. When love is gone, it's gone. And there is no point in pulling the cat by the tail.

Neither children, nor illness, nor financial factors have ever stopped anyone. When a man wants to leave, he leaves. Immediately and forever. He leaves with one suitcase. He leaves, leaving seven on the benches. He leaves, leaving everything behind, without thinking about anything and without looking back.

And everything else is fairy tales for naive girls. Wait. We will contact you.